Speak with authenticity and honesty in a way that maintains your self-respect and respect for others. Make sure to validate the other person and summarize their point of view- this doesn’t mean you agree with them but it shows you understand and hear them which prevents a conversation from escalating into unproductive territory. These two skills are so hard when you are in a hot emotional state but keep them in mind and with practice it gets easier to communicate more effectively when triggered or upset. This is one of my daily practices- Can I speak authentic and honest words in a respectful way? Do I understand the other person’s thinking and emotional experience? If I make a misstep, I practice acceptance that it happened and self-compassion that I’m only human and will do better next time.